Realization (from journal: 6/21/05)
I came to a startling realization today. I was trying to spend my fathers day gift card of $25 to Barnes & Noble, looking through every possible book imaginable. There were a few that piqued my interest, but I realized I did not want to get another "How to" book. I don't want people telling me HOW to create something. I think I need to discover and experiment (granted this ends in more failue than success, but it's the whole Edison Process). I thought I might want a coffee table book of my favorite master artist when I realized - I don't have one! More than that, I don't have a/an artist who I look up to. Granted, that could be my own ignorance but I don't have any particular artist I would WANT to hang on my wall or have a book about!(?)
Now... as I pondered these things later, I could hear God tugging on my spirit.
"Let Me be your Master, Inspriation, Guide, Mentor"
And I know these words to be true. I trust them.
But if that is the case - why do I keep looking for inspiration outside Him?
Atrophy (from journal date: May 2005)
I see within all men various attributes which set them apart from one another. Attributes which do not set one higher than the other, just nuances that create wonderful diversity. While it can be argued that certain attributes can be attained by all (i.e. strength can be achieved by regular excersize and intellegence by regular study), There seems to be a special something which pushes certain individuals higher to more incredible levels of achievement (i.e. Olympians, Mensas).
In the scope of creativity we also see individuals whose minds exist on different planes causing them not only to see the world differently, but to share it with others in a contributive way (possibly, the key difference which separates psychotics from eccentrics (i.e. Dhamer vs. Dali).).
An Olympian is in constant need of excersise, a genius is in constant need of research, for the creative mind - time must be spent living "elsewhere". Staring into clouds, reading, finding OTHER means of explaination than strength or logic. Deprive an Olympian of training or a Genius of experimentation an the muscles both mind and body begin to atrophy. But where does creativity lie? There are three aspects to man, Mind, Body, and Soul. Since strength and intellegence comprise the 1st two then perhaps creativity lies in the soul.
Deprived of daydreaming, living "elsewhere", being too busy to build the muscle of creativity perhaps it is the soul that dies...
